Greetings: From the Cramped Confines of My New Workspace
07 Jun 2011 Leave a Comment
For the past two years I have spent 95% (per my husband and children) of my time in my office. The office–my office was a blessing and a curse. Because of that place, I have been able to escape when I don’t feel like being bothered, work behind a closed door (complete silence when I need it), and daycation whenever.
Alas, motherhood is bittersweet (at times). I have been asking Yahweh to create a solution to the complaints of my family. They all feel that I spend too much time in the office, even those who don’t live with me. My sister expressed last week that she no longer enjoys visiting my home because she has to sit at my desk and visit with me in my office. “You don’t get up and make us coffee or anything anymore. I won’t come see you anymore,” she complained. I understood her problem but it has seemed to me for some time that I cannot control my attachment to the office.
I prayed.
Yahweh answers prayers. My children are growing up and I did not think a time would come when they would need their own space, especially the twins. They have always fought, but I have constantly been hearing their silent, violent battles through the wall that separates their room from my office for the past six months.
The youngest of the twins finally came to me and asked for her own room. My husband was reluctant. As much as he wants me to come out of my office, he is an advocate for my rights and space and time and happiness, so he was against it. I think, too, he sees the twins as a pair. The idea of separating them took some time for my whole family to accept (similar to their decision to stop dressing alike).
Anyway, today I gave up my office space for my daughters and all three of my children saw how much of a struggle this was for me. When I was hanging the letters that spelled her name across the wall of her new room–my old office, Dymond placed her bigger-than-last-year-hand on the small of my back and said, “I know this is very hard for you. I can tell you want to cry, but thank you. I’ll take care of this room. I promise.”
I cried, but not because I was letting go of the room. My girls deserve their own room. They earned it this academic school year. They learned and taught so much. They passed the TAKS, received presidential awards, and graduated from elementary school. They learned to iron their clothes, set their alarms and get up on their own for school, and respect the time of others this year.
I’ve learned that I don’t want to miss next year because I spend too much time in my office. My new space is not as comfortable as my old space and I’m sure I won’t want to spend 95% of my time here.
